Spring Break is upon us! I can't believe it!!!
Many of you are going out of town, so the blogs will be on hold this week! :)
Have a great time this week, relax and enjoy this weather!
Saturday, April 2, 2011
Wednesday, March 30, 2011
Consistency is Key
Consistency
Being consistent is a pretty important quality to have in all areas of life. Look at Romans 2:7: “He will give eternal life to those who keep on doing good, seeking after the glory and honor and immortality that God offers” (NLT). Notice how it says “who keep on”? God honors people who don’t give up and who continue to do what they’re supposed to.
Our relationships with our parents are like a bank. Every action is either a deposit into the bank of trust or a withdrawal from the bank of trust. Trying hard in school, completing chores, being present at family events … these are all actions that could be considered deposits. The opposite action of these could be considered withdrawals.
If you have a rough relationship with your parents and are having a hard time getting them to trust you, perhaps it’s because you’re not consistent. It’s awesome that you came home by curfew time last night, but if you weren’t on time several instances before that it’s easy to see why they don’t feel they can trust you when you’ve shown them you’re more interested in making withdrawals than deposits.
I’m not saying that being consistently good and responsible will earn you a pass from doing the dishes, taking out the trash, or doing your own laundry if those are chores your parents have given you. Your parents are busy people, especially if they both work. In order for everything to get done around the house and for them to still be emotionally stable there’s no reason why their able-bodied child can’t help out. I’m just saying that things could be a lot more difficult for you if your parents sensed a rebellious spirit or a lack of personal responsibility.
Want to see how consistent you are? Take this quiz!
1. You come home at or before curfew.
A. Regularly B. Sometimes C. Never
2. You do your chores and/or homework.
A. Regularly B. Sometimes C. Never
3. You are present and on time for activities you know are important to your parents.
A. Regularly B. Sometimes C. Never
4. You tell your parents the truth.
A. Regularly B. Sometimes C. Never
5. You obey your parents.
A. Regularly B. Sometimes C. Never
Results
Mostly As: You are consistently showing your parents that you are responsible and trustworthy. You are building an excellent foundation in your relationship with your parents.
Mostly Bs: Your parents have reason to hesitate with trusting you, but it’s not too late! Step it up and show them how dependable you are.
Mostly Cs: Start fresh. Sit down with your parents and let them in on your new plan to be consistent. Apologize for the past and move on.
In your journal, write a prayer asking God to help you be consistent. What does being consistent look like in your life?
Being consistent is a pretty important quality to have in all areas of life. Look at Romans 2:7: “He will give eternal life to those who keep on doing good, seeking after the glory and honor and immortality that God offers” (NLT). Notice how it says “who keep on”? God honors people who don’t give up and who continue to do what they’re supposed to.
Our relationships with our parents are like a bank. Every action is either a deposit into the bank of trust or a withdrawal from the bank of trust. Trying hard in school, completing chores, being present at family events … these are all actions that could be considered deposits. The opposite action of these could be considered withdrawals.
If you have a rough relationship with your parents and are having a hard time getting them to trust you, perhaps it’s because you’re not consistent. It’s awesome that you came home by curfew time last night, but if you weren’t on time several instances before that it’s easy to see why they don’t feel they can trust you when you’ve shown them you’re more interested in making withdrawals than deposits.
I’m not saying that being consistently good and responsible will earn you a pass from doing the dishes, taking out the trash, or doing your own laundry if those are chores your parents have given you. Your parents are busy people, especially if they both work. In order for everything to get done around the house and for them to still be emotionally stable there’s no reason why their able-bodied child can’t help out. I’m just saying that things could be a lot more difficult for you if your parents sensed a rebellious spirit or a lack of personal responsibility.
Want to see how consistent you are? Take this quiz!
1. You come home at or before curfew.
A. Regularly B. Sometimes C. Never
2. You do your chores and/or homework.
A. Regularly B. Sometimes C. Never
3. You are present and on time for activities you know are important to your parents.
A. Regularly B. Sometimes C. Never
4. You tell your parents the truth.
A. Regularly B. Sometimes C. Never
5. You obey your parents.
A. Regularly B. Sometimes C. Never
Results
Mostly As: You are consistently showing your parents that you are responsible and trustworthy. You are building an excellent foundation in your relationship with your parents.
Mostly Bs: Your parents have reason to hesitate with trusting you, but it’s not too late! Step it up and show them how dependable you are.
Mostly Cs: Start fresh. Sit down with your parents and let them in on your new plan to be consistent. Apologize for the past and move on.
In your journal, write a prayer asking God to help you be consistent. What does being consistent look like in your life?
Monday, March 28, 2011
Best Friends Forever
One of the things that causes a lot of stress between us and our parents is the friends that we choose. I can't even count the number of arguments I have had with my parents about the people I chose to spend my time with during middle and high school. I don't think I ever went into friendships or dating relationships thinking "Yes, this is a person that will compete with my values and family! Yes, this is a person that I know is living in sin! Let's do this!" If we don't know how to select the right friends, the wrong ones select us.
Let's face it, we are born in sin. No one had to teach us how to take toys away, hit, or bite. No one had to teach us to talk badly about others, to lie, or to be selfish. We've got the sin, foolishness, and naivety under control all by ourselves. Our parents did have to teach us to keep our hands to ourselves, to share, to be kind, and to tell the truth. God has called our parents to teach us how to choose our friends, just like He called them to teach us to walk and to protect us. As difficult as it may be to listen to and respect our parents when they want to talk about our friends, it is important.
Why is choosing the right kind of friends important? Because, you will become like the people you spend time with. I remember screaming at my mother, telling her that "I was my own person and my friends were just fine!" After she shared her concern for my choice of friends. She explained that she had noticed some attitude and speech changes in me, that copied those of my friends. Truth is, she was right. (Don't tell her.)
My best friend in middle school used to brag about how many boys she had kissed, something that was never really important to me. She had a list of boys she had kissed, and boys she wanted to kiss. She made it her goal to kiss these boys, even though she had no relationship with them. Suddenly, kissing boys became important to me. I wanted a list. I wanted bragging rights. So, I joined in.
Another friend of mine did not have a good relationship with her parents. They were not the best parents in the world, and she was hurt and angry. She spoke to her parents with no respect, and constantly said negative things about them. I have always had a great relationship with my parents, but after spending time with her I started talking to them differently.
This isn' just for bad attitudes or behaviors. Later on, in college my roommate had this amazing and funny Boston accent. WIthout even meaning to, I eventually started picking up words here or there in the same accent. The fact is-you will become like the people you spend time with rather you want to or not. So, it definitely matters who your friends are.
What does God say about all this? How do we choose the right friends?
Read Proverbs 12:26 (NLT)
Read Proverbs 13:20 (NLT)
Read Proverbs 22:24-25 (NLT)
Read Proverbs 24:21-22 (NLT)
Read 1 Corinthians 15:33-34 (NLT)
Read Psalms 1:1-2 (NLT)
God tells us who to be friends with. Plain and clear, and He tells us why. True friendships bring us cheer, approval, comfort, love, and joy. We all desire friendships. God placed this desire in you. God designed you to have a personal relationship with Him and with others. We need friendships to help each other do God's will. When our hearts are heavy or anxious and we are struggling, we need someone to pray with us and for us. Have your friends trued to push you into things that you don't want to do or know are wrong? As challenging as these pressures may be, they are an opportunity to stand up for what is right and true.
God tells us that our friends should love at all times (Proverbs 17:17 NLT)
God tells us that our friends should be able to help us in times of trouble (Luke 11:5-8 NLT)
Avoid friendships that are based on money/material things, or sin. Avoid friendships with people that have bad tempers, who speak foolishly, who rebel against authority, and who are dishonest.
In order to choose your friends wisely, you must pray for guidance and ask for advice. (1 Kings 3:12)
The next time your parents talk to you about who you are choosing as your friend, listen. Ask them what changes they see in you, if any. Ask how they feel or think about the friends you already have. Do they have concerns? If so, you should too.
After reading the above scriptures, you should have a good idea for what kind of friends God wants you to have. Do your friends meet those requirements?
While having Christian friends that speak and behave in a way that honors God is important, both your parents and you need to understand that God is not telling you to avoid non-believers. (Galatians 6:10 NLT) You will have classmates, teammates, and co-workers that do not believe in God, nevertheless share the same morals or values that you do. You just need to be careful about when an aquaintence crosses the line into friendship and when a person starts to influence you.
In your journal, make a list of what kind of friends God wants you to have, what kind of friends He wants you to avoid, and what kind of friends you already have. Look at your list and decide if your friends are true friends. Write about a time you've had an argument with your parents about your friends. What could you differently now that you understand why they felt the need to talk to you? Ask God to guide you in the friendships that you make, and ask Him to help you balance being kind and friendly to non-beilevers and having close friends that are Christians.
Let's face it, we are born in sin. No one had to teach us how to take toys away, hit, or bite. No one had to teach us to talk badly about others, to lie, or to be selfish. We've got the sin, foolishness, and naivety under control all by ourselves. Our parents did have to teach us to keep our hands to ourselves, to share, to be kind, and to tell the truth. God has called our parents to teach us how to choose our friends, just like He called them to teach us to walk and to protect us. As difficult as it may be to listen to and respect our parents when they want to talk about our friends, it is important.
Why is choosing the right kind of friends important? Because, you will become like the people you spend time with. I remember screaming at my mother, telling her that "I was my own person and my friends were just fine!" After she shared her concern for my choice of friends. She explained that she had noticed some attitude and speech changes in me, that copied those of my friends. Truth is, she was right. (Don't tell her.)
My best friend in middle school used to brag about how many boys she had kissed, something that was never really important to me. She had a list of boys she had kissed, and boys she wanted to kiss. She made it her goal to kiss these boys, even though she had no relationship with them. Suddenly, kissing boys became important to me. I wanted a list. I wanted bragging rights. So, I joined in.
Another friend of mine did not have a good relationship with her parents. They were not the best parents in the world, and she was hurt and angry. She spoke to her parents with no respect, and constantly said negative things about them. I have always had a great relationship with my parents, but after spending time with her I started talking to them differently.
This isn' just for bad attitudes or behaviors. Later on, in college my roommate had this amazing and funny Boston accent. WIthout even meaning to, I eventually started picking up words here or there in the same accent. The fact is-you will become like the people you spend time with rather you want to or not. So, it definitely matters who your friends are.
What does God say about all this? How do we choose the right friends?
Read Proverbs 12:26 (NLT)
Read Proverbs 13:20 (NLT)
Read Proverbs 22:24-25 (NLT)
Read Proverbs 24:21-22 (NLT)
Read 1 Corinthians 15:33-34 (NLT)
Read Psalms 1:1-2 (NLT)
God tells us who to be friends with. Plain and clear, and He tells us why. True friendships bring us cheer, approval, comfort, love, and joy. We all desire friendships. God placed this desire in you. God designed you to have a personal relationship with Him and with others. We need friendships to help each other do God's will. When our hearts are heavy or anxious and we are struggling, we need someone to pray with us and for us. Have your friends trued to push you into things that you don't want to do or know are wrong? As challenging as these pressures may be, they are an opportunity to stand up for what is right and true.
God tells us that our friends should love at all times (Proverbs 17:17 NLT)
God tells us that our friends should be able to help us in times of trouble (Luke 11:5-8 NLT)
Avoid friendships that are based on money/material things, or sin. Avoid friendships with people that have bad tempers, who speak foolishly, who rebel against authority, and who are dishonest.
In order to choose your friends wisely, you must pray for guidance and ask for advice. (1 Kings 3:12)
The next time your parents talk to you about who you are choosing as your friend, listen. Ask them what changes they see in you, if any. Ask how they feel or think about the friends you already have. Do they have concerns? If so, you should too.
After reading the above scriptures, you should have a good idea for what kind of friends God wants you to have. Do your friends meet those requirements?
While having Christian friends that speak and behave in a way that honors God is important, both your parents and you need to understand that God is not telling you to avoid non-believers. (Galatians 6:10 NLT) You will have classmates, teammates, and co-workers that do not believe in God, nevertheless share the same morals or values that you do. You just need to be careful about when an aquaintence crosses the line into friendship and when a person starts to influence you.
In your journal, make a list of what kind of friends God wants you to have, what kind of friends He wants you to avoid, and what kind of friends you already have. Look at your list and decide if your friends are true friends. Write about a time you've had an argument with your parents about your friends. What could you differently now that you understand why they felt the need to talk to you? Ask God to guide you in the friendships that you make, and ask Him to help you balance being kind and friendly to non-beilevers and having close friends that are Christians.
Saturday, March 26, 2011
R-E-S-P-E-C-T!
Continuing with honoring our parents, we will be discussing consideration and respect. Consideration simply means thoughtfullness to others.
Sometimes showing consideration and respect to your family is difficult because they are the ones who have to live with you day in and day out! You spend a lot of time with them since you’re under the same roof and sometimes that can get the best of us.
So as we talk about consideration now, think about how you can be more considerate of your parents.
Read Philippians 2:3-4 (NLT)
We need to value other people more than we value ourselves. So what does that look like in our relationships with our parents?
Chores and homework: If you know you have a responsibility that needs to be completed before the night is over, be considerate and show initiative. Tell your parents what your plan of attack is for completing that task so they know that you are aware that it needs to be done. Ex: I'd like to watch a TV show, but first I'll unload the dishwasher and do my homework.
Pick up after yourself: Don’t leave your stuff on the bathroom floor or scattered through the house; Be considerate of your parents by leaving things and rooms better than how you found it.
Your parents will love that they have such a considerate daughter that is respectful of the boundaries they have set and wants to set their minds at ease.
Read James 3:17 (NLT)
So when we receive wisdom from God, all of those other qualities start showing themselves … including consideration. So seek God’s wisdom if you struggle with this area in your relationship with your parents!
Want to evaluate your consideration? Take this quiz!
1. You leave dirty clothes and/or wet towel on the floor of the bathroom you share with other family members.
A. Never B. Sometimes C. Often
2. You present a list of requests, frustrations, or engage in heavy topics of conversation within minutes of your parent(s) arriving home from a long day or when it’s time for bed.
A. Never B. Sometimes C. Often
3. You control the remote while you’re home watching TV, regardless of who else is in the room with you.
A. Never B. Sometimes C. Often
4. You answer your phone, play games, or text during dinner or another designated family activities.
A. Never B. Sometimes C. Often
5. You wait to tell your parents about your plans, activities, or needs until last minute.
A. Never B. Sometimes C. Often
Results
Mostly As: You are very considerate to your parents. They will recognize your responsibility and be more likely to trust you.
Mostly Bs: You’re on your way to being considerate but you still have times when you are selfish. Think about how you can improve.
Mostly Cs: You have some work to do.
In your journal, write about what consideration means to you. How do you show consideration to your family? How can you improve? Write a prayer asking God to show you opportunities to be considerate and respectful.
Sometimes showing consideration and respect to your family is difficult because they are the ones who have to live with you day in and day out! You spend a lot of time with them since you’re under the same roof and sometimes that can get the best of us.
So as we talk about consideration now, think about how you can be more considerate of your parents.
Read Philippians 2:3-4 (NLT)
We need to value other people more than we value ourselves. So what does that look like in our relationships with our parents?
Chores and homework: If you know you have a responsibility that needs to be completed before the night is over, be considerate and show initiative. Tell your parents what your plan of attack is for completing that task so they know that you are aware that it needs to be done. Ex: I'd like to watch a TV show, but first I'll unload the dishwasher and do my homework.
Pick up after yourself: Don’t leave your stuff on the bathroom floor or scattered through the house; Be considerate of your parents by leaving things and rooms better than how you found it.
Your parents will love that they have such a considerate daughter that is respectful of the boundaries they have set and wants to set their minds at ease.
Read James 3:17 (NLT)
So when we receive wisdom from God, all of those other qualities start showing themselves … including consideration. So seek God’s wisdom if you struggle with this area in your relationship with your parents!
Want to evaluate your consideration? Take this quiz!
1. You leave dirty clothes and/or wet towel on the floor of the bathroom you share with other family members.
A. Never B. Sometimes C. Often
2. You present a list of requests, frustrations, or engage in heavy topics of conversation within minutes of your parent(s) arriving home from a long day or when it’s time for bed.
A. Never B. Sometimes C. Often
3. You control the remote while you’re home watching TV, regardless of who else is in the room with you.
A. Never B. Sometimes C. Often
4. You answer your phone, play games, or text during dinner or another designated family activities.
A. Never B. Sometimes C. Often
5. You wait to tell your parents about your plans, activities, or needs until last minute.
A. Never B. Sometimes C. Often
Results
Mostly As: You are very considerate to your parents. They will recognize your responsibility and be more likely to trust you.
Mostly Bs: You’re on your way to being considerate but you still have times when you are selfish. Think about how you can improve.
Mostly Cs: You have some work to do.
In your journal, write about what consideration means to you. How do you show consideration to your family? How can you improve? Write a prayer asking God to show you opportunities to be considerate and respectful.
Friday, March 25, 2011
Nah-Nah-Nah-Nah-Boo-Boo!
I know that my previous entry stated we were going to be talking about how to honor our parents. This entry is going to be off that track, but don't worry-we'll get right back on it tomorrow. I feel this entry needs to happen, and I hope God uses it to encourage you.
When I was little my sister, my cousin Tiffany, and I had a club at my grandmother's house. Girl's ONLY! Tiffany's older brother Matthew and his friends (one of which I am now married to!) used to come over and bother us by teasing us, pulling our hair, and making fun of us. Matthew would grab our hair and scream, "Nah-Nah-Nah-Nah-Boo-Boo, Stick Your Head in DOO-DOO!" At the time, I thought this was as bad as bullying gets. We would cry and run inside and tell our grandmother, leaving her to do our dirty work. Now, I know that we were just being silly and my cousin and his friends were joking with us. But, that is not my only experience with being bullied or bullying someone else.
In middle school my best friend and I were insperable. We went everywhere together, and none of our other friends ever saw one of us without the other. We called ourselves (and still do) "Ultimate BFs". I am happy to say that we are still very close, but there was a brief time in middle school that we were enemies. We had drifted apart, and started having different friends. My ultimate BF started hanging around girls that enjoyed making fun of me. She never stood up for me, never apologized for their words, and eventually stopped hanging out with me completely. During that time her friends called me names that I won't repeat, spread rumors about me, and pushed me around in the halls of our school. It wasn't until my ultimate BF was hurt by them as well that she and I reconciled. That was a truly difficult time for me. I felt alone and scared and hurt.
Later on, in high school I started my first job. I was the only girl that worked there, and it never bothered me until one night when we were closing, one of the guys that worked there slammed me against a wall, held me down, and touched me. He pulled my hair and called me horrible names. He then made me get in his car, and he locked the doors. I was scared, and crying. I managed to unlock the door and get to my car without him saying anything or doing anything. I didn't tell anyone. I quit my job, but never told anyone the real reason. I didn't tell because I was afraid, embarassed, and honestly-I thought it was my fault. Years and years later, I finally told my husband because I had seen this guy out somewhere in town. I saw him and literally ran away. Still, after all these years this guy made me afraid. My husband comforted me, and encouraged me and fought back his urge to kick that guys butt. I was hurt, scared, broken, and it was only after I told my husband that I was able to move on.
Bullying is a big deal. I know, I know-it's become somewhat of a fad for adults to discuss bullying, and push those posters about anti-bullying in your face every other week. But, seriously-bullying is a problem, and we're not only going to discuss what it means to be bullied, or bully someone-but also what God says about it.
Perhaps you’ve watched a friend be bullied at school or maybe you’ve even been bullied yourself.
In the past few months, it’s become pretty clear that bullying is a major issue for teens today. Some girls have been bullied to the point of sustaining major emotional and physical trauma and even committing suicide.
Bullying is abuse. Typically, bullying can be categorized as emotional, verbal, or physical abuse. It typically involves subtle methods of manipulation. Victims of bullying suffer in many ways including emotionally, physically, and academically. Though it can be a very painful and difficult experience it is, unfortunately, all too common. About one in five students feels bullied at some point during their school years.
Bullies can target their victims for just about any reason. It can be because of your faith, the color of your skin, because you wore a sweater you bought from a garage sale (which I do quite proudly and frequently now), or simply because you were in the wrong place at the wrong time.
When you’re being bullied, it can feel like there’s really nothing you can do to stop it. Going to school can become dreadful. It can feel like you’re all alone in the world. However, it can also help you discover who your true friends are – the ones who will stand beside you when you have a bad day and will stand up for you when you need it.
I am sad to say that I have been a bully. Many of you know some of those stories and experiences, and I know that most, if not all of you have bullied someone else. Here's what the Bible says about bullying:
Read Leviticus 19:18 (NLT)
Read Psalm 34:12-18 (NLT)
Read 1 John 2:9 (NLT)
Read Romans 2:1 (NLT)
God says a lot about how He feels when we bully one another. He is hurt, dissapointed, and tells us that we will have consequences for the way we treat others. This is something I struggled with for a long time-all through middle and high school. It's so easy to judge others, it's easy to pick on them, it's easy to make jokes at their expense, it's easy to make others feel bad in order to make myself feel good. God hasn't called me to live a life of ease. He has called me, and you, to live a life that honors Him.
Read Ephesians 5:8-11 (NLT)
We were once living in darkness and evil and sin, but now-now we live in the light of the Lord. As Christians, God has called us to turn away from sin and do what is good, right, and true.
Unfortunately, I have also been on the other end of bullying, as I'm sure many of you have. I have been hurt, broken, scared, and alone because someone treated me with disrespect, a judgemental attitude, and harsh words or actions. Bullying hurts. Truly. What encouragement can God offer me when I'm being bullied? Not only does God tell us offer encouragement, but He tells us how to handle the people who are bullying us.
Read Philippians 4:4-7 (NLT)
Read Psalm 34:12-18 (NLT)
Read Psalm 18:3 (NLT)
Read Matthew 5:38-39 (NLT)
Read Matthew 5:43-48 (NLT)
Read Romans 12:19-20 (NLT)
Read 2 Timothy 1:7 (NLT)
God calls us to love and forgive the people that bully us. He calls us to show them compassion, and to show understanding. This is so hard, and may feel like God's asking you to do something ridiculous. But, God also promises that He will hold the bully accountable, the bully will receive consequences, and that He will support and comfort you in times of trouble.
While the Bible tells us what we should do in both situations to please and honor God, you may still have questions about making the bullying stop for you and your friends. If you are being bullied talk to an adult that you trust who can help make the bullying stop. If you see someone being bullied, don't just stand there! Say something! Bullying happens because people who know that it is wrong do nothing to stop it, or we are too afraid to tell someone who can help us.
How do you know you are being bullied?
If you are worried or afraid of going somewhere or seeing or talking to a certain person/people because of the way they make you feel due to them hitting you, calling you names, or forcing you to do things you don't like, then you are being bullied.
In your journal, write about a time you were bullied or you bullied someone else. How did it make you feel? What did the people around you do? How did you handle the situation? After reading what God says about bullying, how do you feel? What are some ways we can stop bullying in our community? If you are being bullied-please tell me so that I can help you.
When I was little my sister, my cousin Tiffany, and I had a club at my grandmother's house. Girl's ONLY! Tiffany's older brother Matthew and his friends (one of which I am now married to!) used to come over and bother us by teasing us, pulling our hair, and making fun of us. Matthew would grab our hair and scream, "Nah-Nah-Nah-Nah-Boo-Boo, Stick Your Head in DOO-DOO!" At the time, I thought this was as bad as bullying gets. We would cry and run inside and tell our grandmother, leaving her to do our dirty work. Now, I know that we were just being silly and my cousin and his friends were joking with us. But, that is not my only experience with being bullied or bullying someone else.
In middle school my best friend and I were insperable. We went everywhere together, and none of our other friends ever saw one of us without the other. We called ourselves (and still do) "Ultimate BFs". I am happy to say that we are still very close, but there was a brief time in middle school that we were enemies. We had drifted apart, and started having different friends. My ultimate BF started hanging around girls that enjoyed making fun of me. She never stood up for me, never apologized for their words, and eventually stopped hanging out with me completely. During that time her friends called me names that I won't repeat, spread rumors about me, and pushed me around in the halls of our school. It wasn't until my ultimate BF was hurt by them as well that she and I reconciled. That was a truly difficult time for me. I felt alone and scared and hurt.
Later on, in high school I started my first job. I was the only girl that worked there, and it never bothered me until one night when we were closing, one of the guys that worked there slammed me against a wall, held me down, and touched me. He pulled my hair and called me horrible names. He then made me get in his car, and he locked the doors. I was scared, and crying. I managed to unlock the door and get to my car without him saying anything or doing anything. I didn't tell anyone. I quit my job, but never told anyone the real reason. I didn't tell because I was afraid, embarassed, and honestly-I thought it was my fault. Years and years later, I finally told my husband because I had seen this guy out somewhere in town. I saw him and literally ran away. Still, after all these years this guy made me afraid. My husband comforted me, and encouraged me and fought back his urge to kick that guys butt. I was hurt, scared, broken, and it was only after I told my husband that I was able to move on.
Bullying is a big deal. I know, I know-it's become somewhat of a fad for adults to discuss bullying, and push those posters about anti-bullying in your face every other week. But, seriously-bullying is a problem, and we're not only going to discuss what it means to be bullied, or bully someone-but also what God says about it.
Perhaps you’ve watched a friend be bullied at school or maybe you’ve even been bullied yourself.
In the past few months, it’s become pretty clear that bullying is a major issue for teens today. Some girls have been bullied to the point of sustaining major emotional and physical trauma and even committing suicide.
Bullying is abuse. Typically, bullying can be categorized as emotional, verbal, or physical abuse. It typically involves subtle methods of manipulation. Victims of bullying suffer in many ways including emotionally, physically, and academically. Though it can be a very painful and difficult experience it is, unfortunately, all too common. About one in five students feels bullied at some point during their school years.
Bullies can target their victims for just about any reason. It can be because of your faith, the color of your skin, because you wore a sweater you bought from a garage sale (which I do quite proudly and frequently now), or simply because you were in the wrong place at the wrong time.
When you’re being bullied, it can feel like there’s really nothing you can do to stop it. Going to school can become dreadful. It can feel like you’re all alone in the world. However, it can also help you discover who your true friends are – the ones who will stand beside you when you have a bad day and will stand up for you when you need it.
I am sad to say that I have been a bully. Many of you know some of those stories and experiences, and I know that most, if not all of you have bullied someone else. Here's what the Bible says about bullying:
Read Leviticus 19:18 (NLT)
Read Psalm 34:12-18 (NLT)
Read 1 John 2:9 (NLT)
Read Romans 2:1 (NLT)
God says a lot about how He feels when we bully one another. He is hurt, dissapointed, and tells us that we will have consequences for the way we treat others. This is something I struggled with for a long time-all through middle and high school. It's so easy to judge others, it's easy to pick on them, it's easy to make jokes at their expense, it's easy to make others feel bad in order to make myself feel good. God hasn't called me to live a life of ease. He has called me, and you, to live a life that honors Him.
Read Ephesians 5:8-11 (NLT)
We were once living in darkness and evil and sin, but now-now we live in the light of the Lord. As Christians, God has called us to turn away from sin and do what is good, right, and true.
Unfortunately, I have also been on the other end of bullying, as I'm sure many of you have. I have been hurt, broken, scared, and alone because someone treated me with disrespect, a judgemental attitude, and harsh words or actions. Bullying hurts. Truly. What encouragement can God offer me when I'm being bullied? Not only does God tell us offer encouragement, but He tells us how to handle the people who are bullying us.
Read Philippians 4:4-7 (NLT)
Read Psalm 34:12-18 (NLT)
Read Psalm 18:3 (NLT)
Read Matthew 5:38-39 (NLT)
Read Matthew 5:43-48 (NLT)
Read Romans 12:19-20 (NLT)
Read 2 Timothy 1:7 (NLT)
God calls us to love and forgive the people that bully us. He calls us to show them compassion, and to show understanding. This is so hard, and may feel like God's asking you to do something ridiculous. But, God also promises that He will hold the bully accountable, the bully will receive consequences, and that He will support and comfort you in times of trouble.
While the Bible tells us what we should do in both situations to please and honor God, you may still have questions about making the bullying stop for you and your friends. If you are being bullied talk to an adult that you trust who can help make the bullying stop. If you see someone being bullied, don't just stand there! Say something! Bullying happens because people who know that it is wrong do nothing to stop it, or we are too afraid to tell someone who can help us.
How do you know you are being bullied?
If you are worried or afraid of going somewhere or seeing or talking to a certain person/people because of the way they make you feel due to them hitting you, calling you names, or forcing you to do things you don't like, then you are being bullied.
In your journal, write about a time you were bullied or you bullied someone else. How did it make you feel? What did the people around you do? How did you handle the situation? After reading what God says about bullying, how do you feel? What are some ways we can stop bullying in our community? If you are being bullied-please tell me so that I can help you.
Ketchup & What to Wear Wednesday
We're going to play a game called Ketchup, which is really "catch up". Thank you for your prayers. My grandfather is still in ICU, and has had yet another surgery. He is recovering & we are praying for God to heal him. I'm going to do What to Wear Wednesday in this entry, then I will post another entry for our devotional!
What to Wear Wednesday
So, Spring is here! Which means, Easter! Which means, dresses!!! How do we wear super cute dresses, but still stay within our definition of modesty?
This outfit is a-dorable! This dress is in style, cute, and still fits the modesty guideline we have for ourselves! Add the fun accessories and it's perfect!
There ya have it! What to wear Wednesday-Easter approved!
What to Wear Wednesday
So, Spring is here! Which means, Easter! Which means, dresses!!! How do we wear super cute dresses, but still stay within our definition of modesty?
This outfit is a-dorable! This dress is in style, cute, and still fits the modesty guideline we have for ourselves! Add the fun accessories and it's perfect!
There ya have it! What to wear Wednesday-Easter approved!
Tuesday, March 22, 2011
So Psh With Your Attitude!
I know, I know. We just had an entry on being respectful to your parents. Ick. Why are we talking about it again? Because, it's that important. We're going to be talking about how to honor our father and mother over the next few entries. So, up first-our attitudes!
Attitude
According to the dictionary, attitude is “the way a person views something or tends to behave towards it."
I love the quote by Charles Swindoll that says “I’m convinced that life is 10% what happens to me and 90% how I react to it. And so it is with you.” How true is that? How many times have you walked away from a conversation with your parents feeling like you made everything worse because of how you reacted and behaved? If you have a bad attitude and tend to be a bit blunt or dramatic with your parents, your life is probably pretty dramatic, emotional, and draining. But it you keep your attitude in check and either respond respectfully or just nod your head if you don’t trust opening your mouth, you probably have a pretty smooth, drama-free life full of a lot of give and take and healthy relationships.
Life happens, but how you respond to it is the bigger issue.
No one is above having a bad attitude. It’s up to us to keep our emotions in check and take control of ourselves and be respectful, mature, and God-honoring.
Bad attitudes can be shown in a lot of different ways.
· Rolling your eyes (come on…who’s guilty of this with their parents?)
· Loud sighs or groans
· Slamming doors
· “Whatever” or “Fine!”
· Temper tantrums (ahem…)
· Talking back to your parents
· Short, snippy responses
Here’s a quick quiz to evaluate your attitude towards your parents.
1. You slam the door when your parent(s) make you upset.
A. Never B. Sometimes C. Often
2. When your mom asks you to do something you roll your eyes.
A. Never B. Sometimes C. Often
3. In the past, when you were angry with your parents, you told them to shut up or leave you alone.
A. Never B. Sometimes C. Most of the time
4. If your parent(s) said you could not go to an event you wanted to go to, you would:
A. Accept their instruction B. Try to reason with them C. Go anyway
5. Your mom says you aren’t allowed to wear something (jewelry, clothing, etc.), but your friends are starting to make fun of you. What would you do?
A. Tell your friends what your parents said. B. Argue with your mom C. Wait until your mom leaves and wear it anyway.
Results:
Mostly As: Your attitude seems to be in line with the Word of God. God will reward you as you continue to grow in Him.
Mostly Bs: You seem to walk the fence. You tend to rationalize your actions. Ask God to help you with attitude self-control.
Mostly Cs: You have an attitude problem, and you need to ask God for His guidance and help with your attitude.
Our parents are our authority-the persons that are "in charge" of us. God tells us exactly how we should act towards our authority figures. Read Titus 3:1-2
In your journal, write about a time that you noticed someone else having a bad attitude. Write how you felt about that person at the time, the way other people treated that person, and the way that person treated others. Now write about a time you had a bad attitude. Think of 5 ways we can start changing our attitudes. Ask God to help you follow these changes.
Attitude
According to the dictionary, attitude is “the way a person views something or tends to behave towards it."
I love the quote by Charles Swindoll that says “I’m convinced that life is 10% what happens to me and 90% how I react to it. And so it is with you.” How true is that? How many times have you walked away from a conversation with your parents feeling like you made everything worse because of how you reacted and behaved? If you have a bad attitude and tend to be a bit blunt or dramatic with your parents, your life is probably pretty dramatic, emotional, and draining. But it you keep your attitude in check and either respond respectfully or just nod your head if you don’t trust opening your mouth, you probably have a pretty smooth, drama-free life full of a lot of give and take and healthy relationships.
Life happens, but how you respond to it is the bigger issue.
No one is above having a bad attitude. It’s up to us to keep our emotions in check and take control of ourselves and be respectful, mature, and God-honoring.
Bad attitudes can be shown in a lot of different ways.
· Rolling your eyes (come on…who’s guilty of this with their parents?)
· Loud sighs or groans
· Slamming doors
· “Whatever” or “Fine!”
· Temper tantrums (ahem…)
· Talking back to your parents
· Short, snippy responses
Here’s a quick quiz to evaluate your attitude towards your parents.
1. You slam the door when your parent(s) make you upset.
A. Never B. Sometimes C. Often
2. When your mom asks you to do something you roll your eyes.
A. Never B. Sometimes C. Often
3. In the past, when you were angry with your parents, you told them to shut up or leave you alone.
A. Never B. Sometimes C. Most of the time
4. If your parent(s) said you could not go to an event you wanted to go to, you would:
A. Accept their instruction B. Try to reason with them C. Go anyway
5. Your mom says you aren’t allowed to wear something (jewelry, clothing, etc.), but your friends are starting to make fun of you. What would you do?
A. Tell your friends what your parents said. B. Argue with your mom C. Wait until your mom leaves and wear it anyway.
Results:
Mostly As: Your attitude seems to be in line with the Word of God. God will reward you as you continue to grow in Him.
Mostly Bs: You seem to walk the fence. You tend to rationalize your actions. Ask God to help you with attitude self-control.
Mostly Cs: You have an attitude problem, and you need to ask God for His guidance and help with your attitude.
Our parents are our authority-the persons that are "in charge" of us. God tells us exactly how we should act towards our authority figures. Read Titus 3:1-2
In your journal, write about a time that you noticed someone else having a bad attitude. Write how you felt about that person at the time, the way other people treated that person, and the way that person treated others. Now write about a time you had a bad attitude. Think of 5 ways we can start changing our attitudes. Ask God to help you follow these changes.
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